Tag: Counselling

Why You Need to Accept Yourself Before You Can Change - Ales Zivkovic Psychotherapy and Counselling Primrose Hill & Belsize Park

Why You Need to Accept Yourself Before You Can Change

You can only change what you see, what you are aware of, what you acknowledge and embrace

You walk into the therapy room filled with hope that the hurt is finally going to end. You open up your vulnerability, your secrets to the one and only person you think can help at that time. It’s hard, but at least initially it seems it’s working.

And then you stumble. You slip right off the edge. Into darkness and despair.

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What to Expect from Therapy - Ales Zivkovic Psychotherapy and Counselling Primrose Hill & Belsize Park

What to Expect from Therapy

Engaging in therapy can be a new experience for many. And it’s even more daunting because one usually goes to therapy when they vulnerable, exposed, empty, hopeless etc. Through therapy you are actually putting yourself in a position when you will need to talk about your pain, vulnerability, emotional or relationship difficulties. Sometimes you are facing all of the above at the same time and it just feels too exposing and shameful to go and talk to a stranger about it. This is normal and almost every client, even those with previous experience with therapy have such fears and dilemmas. However, your therapist fully understands this very ‘human’ challenge and coupled with their knowledge and experience, is able to facilitate your change.

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Ending Psychotherapy or Counselling Naturally - Ending Therapy

Ending Psychotherapy or Counselling Naturally

Ending psychotherapy or counselling should ideally be a part of therapy itself and as such a part of reparative therapeutic relationship. If done appropriately, endings can have a therapeutic impact also and can offer the client a new experience as to how relationships in life can be handled. Even though therapy relationships can differ based on the approach used and also based on the “depth” of psychotherapeutic work, ending therapy should ideally be planned ahead and agreed as part of treatment.

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Terminating Psychotherapy or Counselling Relationship Unexpectedly - Terminating Therapy

Terminating Psychotherapy or Counselling Unexpectedly

Psychotherapy or counselling relationship should ideally terminate when the end goal is met. This is the goal that the client and therapist set as their therapy goal (in transactional analysis we call them treatment contracts). This kind of ending is an ideal one. However, sometimes we find a client terminating psychotherapy or counselling relationship unexpectedly—prior to therapy coming to its natural end. I will focus on the latter scenario of terminating therapy in this post.

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Anxiety and London Property Ladder

Anxiety and the London Property Ladder

Can owning real estate be a defence for one’s own emotional insecurities and deficiencies? Is that the reason for climbing the London property ladder? Can it reduce our existential anxiety? OK, maybe I’m making a giant leap here in my assumption, but still—no reason for the assumption to be completely off—and not all of the time either.

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Social Media Addiction - Ales Zivkovic Psychotherapy and Counselling

Social Media Addiction

Social media addiction is a clear way of saying addiction comes in many forms. A substantial amount of social media usage today is obviously generated out of addiction related behaviour rather than rationally led. And that also comes across in therapy space. Even though internet addiction started gaining attention with the rise of online activity and even before the true birth of social platforms, there has obviously been a massive rise in addiction when this online activity got its fertile ground in social media platforms. Discussions have been raised that problematic internet use (PIU) should be categorised as  an official mental health condition.

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Psychotherapy and Counselling - Starting a Private Therapy Practice in a Big City

Starting a Private Therapy Practice in a Big City

What you will find reading this post is my own personal reflections on starting a private therapy practice in a big city—be it in counselling or psychotherapy. I am sure there is no cookie cutter approach to it—especially given that geographic location is such a massive factor to a therapist’s work—but I guess anyone can learn from anyone else’s experience. At least somewhat. And if they choose to.

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Anxiety and Depression

Month of Stress but Decade of Anxiety

April is stress awareness month. Stress is becoming more and more part of our everyday—we cannot even think of daily life without stress anymore—and as such is also either cause or accompanying many mental health and other psychological issues people bring into psychotherapy and counselling. However, a closer look at the internet search statistics, reveals astonishing figures related to stress, anxiety and depression, which are the top three mental health-related searches in the UK.

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Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Obsessions, Compulsions

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a mental health condition characterised by, as its name suggests, obsessions and compulsions. It should, however, be noted that official psychiatric diagnosis differentiates if from obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD), which regardless of its name is not characterised by actual obsessions and compulsions. OCD is anxiety based condition, which can be successfully attended to in psychotherapy or counselling. When faced with OCD in a therapy room, the condition itself is not hard to diagnose and differentiate from other conditions, however, people presenting with OCD will sometimes tend to hide their symptoms from the therapist due to the sense of shame.

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Relationship with a Narcissist

Relationship with a Narcissist: Are You in One?

Narcissism by nature of the personality structure manifestation makes it hard for a narcissist to engage in authentic and intimate relationships. People who engage in a relationship with a narcissist will often be subject to the lack of connection, empathy and intimacy. They may find themselves under fire of allegations that they are too controlling and smothering. Even though these accusations will be part of narcissist’s distorted reality, there will often also be some pathology related to why someone gets involved with a narcissist in the first place. Usually such pathology will be unconscious.

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